Steven Weber Should Stick to Writing

Friday, February 09, 2007

I've never cared for Steven Weber as an actor. I watched endless hours of "Wings" only because I could never get enough of Tony Shalhoub. I always thought Weber was one of those actors who should have been made to stay after class to write, "I will not indicate. I will not indicate. I will not indicate..." a hundred times on the chalk board. He never seemed to grasp that all important instruction that comedy is only funny when it's played straight.

That said I've been really enjoying his blog on The Huffington Post. With today's entry "Sometimes a Dick is Just a Dick" he's really hit it out of the park.

I dreamt that the Vice President was in drag. Yeah. The Dickster. Doing a little J. Edgar Hoovering. Hold all the petty psychological ramifications you can come up with for a moment. For now indulge me.

He wasn't pretty (at least not by my standards). He had a touch of Bella Abzug to him (large brimmed, flowery hat) with a dash of Tugboat Annie (massive bust resting on cinder block hips).

A large string of costume jewelry pearls swung 'round his pink wattles. He wore a "Come and get me, suckers!" smile, his eyes wild and daring, peering over his trademark rimless glasses. And the coup de grace: thick, beige stockings wrinkled at the ankles and rolled to mid thigh. He grasped the hem of his flower-print shift like a deranged can-can girl and didn't sashay so much as strut, with more zest than he'd ever been known to exhibit while in his "straight" garb.

Punchy. Fresh. Well structured. Rich in imagery. And with just the right note of gravitas. The guy can really write. And yesterday's was even better.

I mostly read blogs to gather information. Every so often you stumble on a blogger who's a real stylist. Steven Weber. Whoda thunk it?